Note: Because his custody is still ongoing, I am using a pseudonym for this litigant.
A military veteran said he was led astray by the advice of two attorneys.
Patrick, as he’s being called here, said his divorce started in 2017, and by December 2018, he and his ex-wife had a permanent custody arrangement, splitting custody time with the children 50/50.
“There was specific days which we were going to switch out,” he stated, “but it was also open ended that if there was a mutual agreement between the two of us, we could change it to week to week or month to month- as long as we both agreed.”
Then, he said he was given two pieces of bad advice from two attorneys.
First, in March 2020, he moved from Maryland to Florida.
An attorney said this would be fine and even work in his favor.
“What she suggested to me was that I could go ahead and move jurisdiction to Florida, and I had some serious reservations about it, and, in fact, I would have actually moved back to Maryland had it not been for what she suggested.” He said.
“It was the biggest mistake I ever made- huge mistake.” He said. “I actually had full custody for a month and a half.”
He said that a Florida court did initially take jurisdiction of the case, but then his ex-wife hired an attorney in Florida; Florida then reversed itself in June 2020, Patrick said, and jurisdiction remained in Maryland.
By moving to Florida without permission, he was then in contempt of a previous Maryland court order.
This was compounded by another piece of bad advice.
A Florida lawyer advised that he could keep his daughter in Florida due to COVID.
He kept his daughter in Florida from April through September 2020.
Patrick’s ex-wife went back to court seeking another contempt of court order; a hearing was held in September 2020.
“Until the hearing that we had over Zoom in September over Zoom, it was going to be fine and just go ahead and keep her down there. I did so reluctantly based on his advice.” Patrick said.
Here is how a Maryland court order stated it, “This new schedule was followed until May, 2020. {his daughter} was in {Patrick’s} custody starting April 4th and she was to be returned to {his ex-wife} on May 5th• As the May 5th day approached, {Patrick} asked to keep {his daughter} until May 10th• When the May I0th date arrived, {Patrick} disclosed he had COVID-19 and needed to quarantine for 14 days. Before the quarantine expired, {his ex} was served with a Petition to Modify Custody and Visitation which {Patrick} filed in the Florida court system. Thereafter, {Patrick} enrolled {his daughter} in school in Florida and refused to return her to {his ex-wife}.”
Instead, a Maryland court found him in contempt and his attorney then advised him to get his daughter back to Maryland right away.
These pieces of bad advice were compounded by several bad actions by Patrick.
Shortly before returning his daughter, he also sent his ex-wife an email stating that he wanted to terminate his parental rights.
The email stated in part.
I wanted to see if Ms. Willet's would be willing to and fine with drafting up paperwork along the lines of my PERMANENTLY signing over my FULL CUSTODIAL RIGHTS of {his daughter}. I will sign those papers immediately and once I SIGN them then it is my intent to NO LONGER interact with {his daughter} permanently, meaning never ever again, with the understanding that this SHALL be in place for the Remainder of the life that I have left remaining on this earth. If that means the next 40 to 50 years then so be it. Once I am given those papers I SHALL SIGN THEM AND I won't change my mind. This SHALL be PERMANENT, AND NOBODY FROM THE {ex-wife’s} FAMILY UNDER any circumstances will ever hear from me ever again. Also, if my current Attorney is willing to draft up this paperwork then I shall sign it also. I make this decision of mine own FREE WILL and in NO WAY, under any kind of circumstances was I coerced nor forced into making this choice by anyone. I am FREELY making this choice of my own FREE WILL and as such I realize the LONGER TERM EFFECTS of this. But it is in MY BEST INTEREST to do this. And I will NOT CHANGE my mind. So, {his daughter} SHALL NO LONGER be a Part of my LIFE for the rest of it period and I totally understand exactly what that means.
He said that he wrote the email because he saw the writing on the wall and believed the rest of the process would be designed to take money from everyone.
“Those pleadings alleged that commencing on the evening of September 14, 2020, ~- {Patrick} began sending text messages and emails to {his ex-wife}, {her counsel} and {the GAL} seeking to terminate his parental rights.” The Maryland court order stated of the email.
He followed that up with another unstable email.
That is NOT COOL, NOT COOL at all to assume there was any emergency when {his ex-wife} Fabricated it by sending 5 policeman to my house last night over severing my Custodial rights!!! NOT COOL, NOT COOL AT ALL!!!. You have FIVE Police show up at YOUR HOUSE unannounced for reasons that you don't even know and see if YOU YOURSELF wouldn't fire off an email at 3 AM in the morning. There was no reason for {his ex-wife} to do that, and I did NOT SAY ANYTHING ABOUT HURTING MYSELF OR ANYBODY WITHIN THE BODY OF MY TEXT THAT I SENT TO HER.
His behavior did indeed cause the local social services to call in the police who made sure his daughter was handed safely to his ex-wife.
He said as a result of all this he now only has supervised visits with his daughter.
He recently reached out to Congress noting, “I have zero criminal history of hurting my child. I have zero criminal history of any violence. I have never been charged with or adjudicated as any kind of felon, nor has there ever been a negative CPS report against me that I am aware of.”
A CPS caseworker did come to his home in Florida right after he was ordered to return his daughter, though he was not found to be a long-term threat.
Patrick also said that he has taken several psychological evaluations which he has passed.
One stated, “This is the second time that I have been asked to perform a psychological evaluation, and assess this now-46 y/o married male, who is attempting to have reinstated his joint legal and physical custody of his 5-year-old daughter, {Patrick’s daughter}, who is currently under the sole custody of the child's mother and his ex-wife. The question being posed is whether there are any reasons, on the basis of his psychological presentation, that he should not be able to have the joint custody resumed.”
Still, based on the bad advice of two attorneys along with some bad decisions he made, he is currently little more than a visitor in his daughter’s life.
Veteran Tells His Custody Tale